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Whilst your date’s occupation, education and interests may be important to you, there is a more creative way to discover more about your date without making them feel like they’re being interviewed.
This question is a cleverly disguised means of learning more about your date’s aspirations and life ambitions to see if you share similar ideals.
But, rather than asking the age old question of “what sort of music do you like” (or indeed pinching their portable music devices for a flick through), ask your date to sum up their personality or life in a song.
This clever alternative question will help you learn a bit more about your date’s music trivia and perhaps even a glimpse of their tastes as well.
Men, on the other hand, did not view these behaviors as indicating that their date was less attracted to them.
Women (more than men) preferred lively conversation, which Cohen suggests might indicate a preference for a man who can “take charge” of a date.
Learn about your dating sites date’s life experiences and passions with this simple question that offers the chance for a bountiful response.
Exchange stories about your travels, favourite spots across the globe or simply the sights you’d love to see one day.
Topics are fine, but specific questions, although necessary at times to break the ice or keep a conversation going, can detract from the experience of bonding. found a negative link between questions and bonding.
When It Comes to Conversation, a First Date Is All About Her Cohen's research showed that successful dates occurred when the woman was able to talk about herself. (2013) studied romantic bonding through exploring interaction ritual theory within the context of heterosexual speed dating,[ii] revealing some interesting conclusions: Overall, interpersonal chemistry was highest when the women were the subjects of conversation and the men demonstrated understanding of the women.
Both sexes reported establishing a connection when the woman had the floor, and a man could create a shared experience by commenting on what his date says. The bonding occurred through reciprocal role coordination, in which the female was the focal point.
Avoid the Rearview Mirror We likely do not need a study to tell us that a first date is not the venue to glorify or vilify past paramours. Sometimes a prospective partner is on the rebound, sulking or stewing over a recent failed relationship that he or she cannot refrain from discussing.
Other first daters intentionally discuss past flames, either in terms of quantity or quality, in an effort to boost their own standing and desirability.
In their study, women used questions as an attempt to revive lagging conversation, and men used questions when they had nothing better to add to the conversation.